A letter to 27…

This week I turned 27, a migration from my mid-twenties into a new era of age. The late twenties. A new chapter I was ready to open, navigating what's to come with a clearer vision of myself then I have ever been to conceive previously. Not big on the celebration of birthdays themselves, I do believe in taking time for myself and that is exactly what I did for my "big day". The existence of life in its simplest form. Enjoying the steady rainfall knowing that my garden will thrive because of it, watching the clouds transform and dance across the ridge of the Bridger mountains across the valley, taking in deep breaths of fresh air with the back door and windows wide open while the air cooled in the passing front, resting my body after consistent days of pushing myself physically and mentally in the mountains, and compiling inspiration for a painting series I am planning to start. No big adventures, no fancy dinners and no revolving door of socializing - just marveling in this gift of life in complete peace and quiet.

I've always loved to read unless I was told to by somebody else (classic), and there wasn't many books from the required reading lists in grade school that stuck with me (or that I did actually read), but The Catcher In The Rye seems to be one that gets mentioned frequently amongst my peers - even today. A 'coming of age' story that touches on the various complexities of becoming an adult vs being treated as an adult all while living in a harsh environment. The story itself and the discussion that my friends typically have around it all seems to poke fun at this concept of 'coming of age' while our government seemingly treats us like children until the age of 25 when you can finally rent a car (but are expected to already be planning for having children). Nevertheless the societal norms pile up, beginning at age 16 and with each birthday another mound of expectations gets thrown at you, always increasing the weight. Only resulting in a mass of disappointment later to those who initially placed those expectations upon you. Go to college, get a good degree, then get a good job - only a 9-5 though, and overwork to climb that ladder, say yes to the promotions, say yes to the responsibility - even if it doesn't result in a pay increase. Find someone to marry, hurry up and get married, now what about buying a house? Because you have to have children! Now try to stay with your job for a few years because it doesn't look good on your resume to jump around, never-mind about your happiness though. Get busy you have a 401-K to contribute to! Think about for when you're 60. You have to pay your dues first then get rewarded later, but don't forget to pay your taxes and grindddd!

Then as a woman, just add another layer. I've had complete strangers ask me why I don't have a ring on my finger or how soon I plan to start having children. "You're running out of time ya know". While boarding a flight to Denver in my early twenties an old man in line behind me told me to hurry up and get married for that 7% tax break. Women in the hair salons discuss their birth timelines, how spaced apart each child will be and what age they plan to be done with having kids. My partner and I celebrate an anniversary and without skipping a beat have friends and family remark on how long we've been together, "it's been a long time now, what about that ring?" Topics I previously catered to out of the pressure to conform, following the pattern of fulfilling that "American Dream".

Don't get me wrong, if this is right up your alley than more power to you - but these aren't the things on my freshly 27-year-old mind and some of these things won't be for at least a while, if maybe ever. An internal battle I have carried on with myself for years believing that there was only one way to succeed in society and that the expectations of others mattered (they don't). I don't dream of diamond rings or big white weddings, and I don't feel left out as some of the women around me become pregnant and pick out baby names - instead I feel free. Free to thrive in a fulfilling relationship with someone on the exact same page as I am, who wholeheartedly trusts and supports me as I do them. Free to pack up and drive wherever we desire to on the weekends to play in the mountains. Free to grow my small business, travel for work and chase Aviation dreams. Free to master my various hobbies and interests, then add more. Free to continue to transform into the greatest version of myself. A freedom that felt squashed today as the United States Supreme Court took a big picture stance to remind women that they are seen as nothing more than a breeder for society.

With this decision I know not much will change for me personally, as my life will continue on in whatever direction I choose to point the heading indicator. But for others this means an end to their own life. A loss so great I have a hard time imagining it myself. A heartbreaking day for those who have worked hard in the fight to support the progression of women's rights, where women already do fight daily battles to break down the expectations so heavily placed on us by society. Making breaking away from the norm even more of a task than it already is. But it's the hard times that test you the most to rise above, something I've always done and will continue to do. The path I've chosen for myself encounters countless roadblocks and closed doors, where I work incredibly hard to prove myself and earn my keep in the multiple male-dominated industries I have my feet in. Where earning my place isn't easy but then again easy isn't what I was after.

So here's to the not easy, and here's to 27.